This time just over a year ago, I felt like a nervous wreck. I felt so anxious that I didn’t really know what to do with myself; I’d travelled the world in search of how to become more balanced, eventually arriving on a course to study homeopathy, which had really helped me evolve. But, some days, I still felt stuck; I felt like there was something missing. I remember the day I met Mandy vividly. The rest of my colleagues had felt that they had grown so much from the homeopathy course and in a ‘sharing circle’ where we shared our feelings, they all said they felt inner peace. I didn’t, of course, and so I felt worse hearing that everyone else was settled and I wasn’t. How was I still not sorted, when everyone around me was?
It was then that someone introduced me to Mandy Spray. I didn’t know why but I was drawn to her settled nature; it felt like she was already home and, instead of being worried about this, like I had been with my colleagues, it felt like she had some profound wisdom that didn’t quite make sense to me yet, but I could tell it would help me journey somewhere special. We chatted for about 20 minutes, and I went home. I remember, just a few days earlier, I had been to a meditation where we brushed leaves gently across our faces to stay focused on the ‘present.’ A few days after I’d chatted to Mandy, I found myself in a little café, journaling, with her number on a little yellow post-it on the page I was writing on. All of a sudden, a little leaf, just like the one that I’d been using to remind myself of presence, floated down onto her post-it; in that moment, I knew – I needed to see her again!
I called Mandy, and – of course – being anxious, I called a few other coaches (you know, just to make sure) and eventually I made the decision to book a Summertime Coaching session in the park with her. I can honestly say, it was the best decision I ever made! Firstly, I’ll start with how the day went… We met at a lovely little café for a drink and a chat about life; it was informal and friendly, and Mandy simply explained something different, that I hadn’t heard before. We continued the conversation about what she called the ‘Three Principles’ as we journeyed around the park, chatting away and laughing and giggling, as if we had been friends for years! Stopping for lunch, time had gone really quickly; we sat and had a bite to eat, overlooking the cricket pitch, reading some bits of some revolutionary books that Mandy pointed to. Then, we walked some more, and enjoyed the green grass, the beautiful flowers, observing how mindful it can be to just breathe and walk and talk – and laugh. Practically, it was an absolutely, gorgeously fun day.
I didn’t really realise until later, but something changed, profoundly, that day. As I walked with Mandy through the most beautiful Regent’s Park, something clicked about how life really works. I don’t know if it was being completely cocooned in the beauty of the true nature of life as Mandy explained, but weathering both sunshine and torrential rain really did help embody the idea that life is a constant flow, and that we can simply dance with our experience of life via our thought in the moment. In a way I’d never had explained to me before, conversation with Mandy enabled me to hear something different; something deeper about the nature of what it is to be human. And in that depth, I found myself; I returned to my truth.
You see, we often forget our true nature in our human experience. Mandy will explain, of course, as you too enjoy wondering around the park to unravel your innate wisdom, but, in essence, we are all operating via ‘thought in the moment,’ all of the time, and we are all divinely guided and, therefore, already perfectly whole and complete. Our experience of life can change like the weather, according to the lens we view it through. In one moment, I loved thunder; in the next, I hated it. This is all thought, moment to moment. If it were truth, everyone would either love or hate thunder, all of the time; it is not truth. This is the same with all of life.
Seeing this, helped me realise that all of my anxiety was just thought. As soon as I knew this, layers of thinking that didn’t serve me just dropped away. I realised that it was even just a thought that I was anxious. I was anxious about being anxious about being anxious – and my true nature wasn’t anxiety; it was calm! This learning was so profound that I now share the principles myself. It changed my life.
The best thing is, there is nothing to do to ‘fix yourself’ – because you’re not broken in the first place. All that I had been searching for: I let go of in that park, that day. And so, whilst Regents Park now feels like a very special place because it was a place I felt I re-found my freedom; actually, that special place was within me, all along. If you don’t yet see that it’s already within you, too, then please, book yourself a session with Mandy – I can’t tell you a better way to spend a day than in the park, unfolding wisdom with one of the most beautiful, understanding souls you could ever meet. And yes, she’s also a reflection of you – perhaps you just don’t see it yet!
Nicole is a passionate Wellbeing Ambassador. Holistically healing herself from Chronic Fatigue, she travelled the globe learning worldly wellbeing techniques – including Homeopathy, Yoga & Meditation – and awakened to the profoundly truthful understanding of what it is to be a human experiencing life through thought! In collaborative Reconnection Retreats with Mandy Spray, and via her wellbeing blog – www.wellbeingwriter.co.uk – she helps people understand life, from the inside-out, sharing insights. Keep in the conversation by signing up to the Wellbeing Wisdom mailing list: www.wellbeingwriter.co.uk/signup or following Nicole via the links below.